29 December 2006

I've been reading these.

"Martin Sloan, age thirty-six, vice-president in charge of media. Successful in most things but not in the one effort that all men try at some time in their lives - trying to go home again. And also like all men perhaps there'll be an occasion, maybe a summer night sometime, when he'll look up from what he's doing and listen to the distant music of a calliope, and hear the voices and the laughter of the people and the places of his past. And perhaps across his mind there'll flit a little errant wish, that a man might not have to become old, never outgrow the parks and the merry-go-rounds of his youth. And he'll smile then too because he'll know it is just an errant wish, some wisp of memory not too important really, some laughing ghosts that cross a man's mind, that are a part of the Twilight Zone."

"A word to the wise now to the garbage collectors of the world, to the curio seekers, to the antique buffs, to everyone who would try to coax out a miracle from unlikely places. Check that bottle you're taking back for a two-cent deposit. The genie you save might be your own. Case in point, Mr. and Mrs. Arthur Castle, fresh from the briefest of trips into the Twilight Zone."

"One time in a million, a coin will land on its edge, but all it takes to knock it over is a vagrant breeze, a vibration or a slight blow. Hector B. Poole, a human coin, on edge for a brief time in the Twilight Zone."
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28 December 2006

Anime is capitalized.

"how much do you know about Anime?" A message stated, waiting inside my inbox.

Sent yesterday, it sat there overnight -- cramped up against the other bloated bits of spam and wine reviewer nonsense I receive at my work address. I have to ask myself: how much can one really know about anime? Was he in essence asking me if I was "cool... man?" Hey man, are you -- you know -- cooool?

"Enough," I reply. "Why do you ask?"

The addresser is a guy down in the mailroom. He shuffles around the FedEx shipments to various people in the office. He's got kids and a brand new non-ipod MP3 player. I like him, he's one of the people here I get along with. When he's in my office we usually discuss things of videogame nature sprinkled with music and a dash of technology. He's interested in the 360, in Ghost Recon. Black, Halo, Rainbow Six. Shooters are his deal, a topic on which I can expound. He knows, with me, to keep the sports talk to a minimum. I guess I just radiate an anti-sports cologne.

"you ever heard of Mezzo Forte?" He replies.

"No, is it any good?"

"hell yeah but there's supposed to be an uncut version of it but I cannot find it"

Doing a google search and popping up with a Wikipedia page it's no wonder the guy can't find it. It's Hentai. That's japanese cartoon porno for the uninitiated. Not really a work topic by any stretch, but I think it's great he felt he could come to me. Even if I had to be felt out first.

You cool man?

He's looking for the Japanese version though, the one you can't get over here. Since I know what he wants me to do without really asking me, I check the torrent sites -- well, the ones I can check at work anyways. A cursory search brings up nothing so I go over to AnimeKrazy. Sure enough, there it is, in all it's uncut glory, for $19.85.

"cool, I knew I came to the right person"

And out it comes, the reason for the seemingly random inquiry. I am, in this office, the man you go to when you need something done right. The man who knows how to get you things.

I love when something comes at me sideways and breaks up the day.

- Holdin' Caulfield
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15 December 2006

Child's Play Update:

This just made my day!

Via Penny Arcade

"Wednesday's Child's Play Charity Auction and Dinner was (I believe it is fair to say) ridiculously successful - photographs of the ridiculous success in progress may be discovered here. Powerful winds took out power to the office, making Kiko's update of the official bar difficult - we'll do it as soon as we're able to. But the new total, as of yesterday, now sits at $760,000. That's Earth Dollars, not shells or bottle caps. Yes, that's just this year. My hope is that we will top eight hundred thousand, because the rhetorical payload is simply too potent: Child's Play will have, officially, raised "millions" of dollars. Specifically, you know... two million. I was going to downplay that figure, but then I remembered that it was two million dollars.

(CW)TB out."
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14 December 2006

I am a tornado

I have a tendency to get so anxious and nervous and filled with dread, that I stir the shit a bit too vigorously and only make matters worse. This is my obsessive behavior. I get all worked up and feel the need to apply a salve to everything that in my compulsive tornado I don’t stop to look around at what I’m actually doing. I’m not making things better; I’m making them worse. I need for everyone to be happy so bad that I make myself unhappy in the process and thus produce an outcome that is opposite of my intensions. I desperately need to come out of my funk if I am going to hold on to the relationships that mean the most to me.

I fear that in my attempt to make everything right, I've made everything wrong.

This is the adult equivalent of the "Christmas Breakdown" I used to have as a kid. A couple of weeks before Christmas I would become standoffish, unmanageable and mean. I would push my mother, who loved me, away. I’d get so worried about what I was going to get for Christmas that the anticipation would keep me awake at night and literally send me into an uncontrollable fit of tears. To my eight-year-old mind the presure was just too much.

Honestly, and that was over GI JOES!

I need to just relax, let it all play out, and remember that I only have this problem because I love these people and these people love me. And that, above all, will carry us through the tough stuff.

As my Mom told me a long time ago: It either doesn't come at all, or it all comes at once. And that's just the way life is.
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12 December 2006


Yesterday we streched it as far as it would go. We streched it so far I'm worried it will never go back to it's original shape. We almost ended it, until we realized that neither one of us wanted to. We each thought we were ruining the other's life, when in fact, it could not be further from the truth. We need to work at it, but I believe -- her and I -- we'll get there.

Now, everything else is going to get streched.

Again, anyone who tells you relationships aren't work is trying to sell you something. Everything worthwhile takes work. I will work on it -- I will work on it with everyone -- but I need time.
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01 December 2006

What is Child's Play?

Since 2003, gamers have banded together through registered Seattle-based charity, Child's Play. Over a million dollars in donations of toys, games, books and cash for sick kids in children's hospitals across North America and the world have been collected since our inception.

We collect no administrative fees or other charges, 100% of all gifts and donations go directly to our partner hospitals, to help make life a little brighter for a sick child.

This year, we have continued expanding across the country and the globe. With over 25 partner hospitals and more arriving every month, you can be sure to find one from the map above that needs your help! You can choose to purchase requested items from their online retailer wish lists, or make a cash donation that helps out Child's Play hospitals everywhere. Any items purchased through Amazon or DStore will be shipped directly to your hospital of choice, please be sure to select their shipping address rather than your own.

When gamers give back, it makes a difference!

This is a charity I dontate to every year since I was made aware of it in 2004. Last year I didn't have much money, but a mere 10 dollars for crayola markers and some coloring books I'm sure made someone happy. Please see the link above or in my sidebar for further details.
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